People need to be told the truth. And they need to get over it when they hear it.

Fuck all this niceness and bullshit, taking into consideration someone else’s feelings before their growth.

When you care about someone, you tell them they’ve got something stuck between their teeth. Or that they’re trailing toilet paper on their shoe at a party. Or their ass is hanging out where their skirt got stuck in their own underwear. You’d tell ‘em, right?

So why wouldn’t you tell them when they’re being lame or being a dumbass, when their heads are stuck so far up their ass that they think that shit smell is normal?

Well, it’s because we don’t wanna be the “bad guy!” We don’t want to be the shit-starter that instigates conflict. We don’t want to be The Asshole, right? I mean, who wants to be that? Ok, I know some people who like to be dicks for the sake of, but whatever…

For the rest of us, it’s because we don’t want to feel bad. We don’t want to ruin the relationship. We don’t want to invest in the stress that we need to go through to get to the other side, to our loved ones’ discovery and success.

We say we care about the other person’s feelings but shut up! We don’t. We’re looking out more for our own. We don’t want that kind of guilt on our conscience or need extra anxiety in our lives. We want to continue to be liked!

But what you’re really saying is, the other person is not worth your time, effort, and respect. That one whom you claim to really care about.

Get over yourself already.

Stop thinking about yourself for a minute and think about your friend instead. Turn the tables around and see yourself in his shit as if it were your own. Feel the filth. You did this. You made the mistakes. You know you have, but most of the time now, you like to dwell in the dreamland of denial. You say to yourself: “This is fine. It’s ok. It’s not that bad. I can live with this.”

Now wouldn’t you wish, in the back of your head, that you had someone courageous and committed enough to jump into your cesspool of a life to slap you awake and yank you out of it?

That could be something your friend needs right now — a bit of a wake-up call. Put your own feelings aside and do the act of actually caring for somebody. Love is not an opinion; it’s an action word.

We all need a bit of a nudge sometimes, or a kick in the head, to remind us that life can be better, that we can DO better. It’s still possible! But it’s tough when the work can only be done alone.

It’s scary to confront a loved one when we think it’s none of our business, even though they’re beloved to us. But the least we can do is approach them and talk. Or ask questions. Maybe just sit with them for a while.

Don’t say to yourself that maybe your friend can’t handle it. That’s disrespectful. You’re implying that they’re not capable, not strong, not worthy. But they’ve just lost their way. They’re still the same good human you’ve always known them to be. They may just need more of you right now.